How Not to Be Taken for Granted

Whether in a romantic relationship, a professional setting, or a casual friendship, it can be easy to take people for granted. At first, being taken for granted may seem like a minor annoyance, but if left unaddressed, it can quickly become toxic and negatively impact your well-being.

Watching out for the signs of being taken for granted can help you take action to address this issue. Besides, there are some tips you can follow to help you avoid being taken advantage of.

7 Signs You Are Being Taken for Granted

How do you know if you are being taken for granted in your relationships? You don’t have to act desperate to get what you deserve in the relationship. Whether it is by friends, family members, or partners, these are some common signs to look out for: 

Signs You Are Being Taken for Granted

1. No Appreciation

Feeling unacknowledged and undervalued can be one of the first signs that you are being taken for granted. If your efforts and contributions are not recognized, or if they are dismissed as “no big deal,” this is a major red flag.

Other signs of unappreciation can include not being thanked for your efforts, having things go “unnoticed,” or receiving rude remarks and put-downs from the person in question.

Most importantly, pay attention to how you feel. If you feel consistently unappreciated or unhappy in your interactions with someone, it may be time to take action and address the situation.

2. Being Ignored

When you are being taken for granted, it can feel like your presence doesn’t matter to the other person. You may find that they seem “disinterested” in what you have to say or go out of their way to avoid spending time with you.

If this is starting to happen in your relationships, be sure to take the time to reach out and connect with the other person. They may be feeling stressed or overwhelmed. Try to find a way to communicate your desires for more closeness and support.

3. Making Demands

Being taken for granted can often involve someone making unreasonable or overly demanding requests of you. This can include things like expecting you to drop everything and help them out at the last minute or always coming to you with their problems without offering support in return.

If someone is making demands of you, set clear boundaries and communicate your needs clearly. This can involve things like letting them know that you have limited time and energy to help others or that you need them to treat you with respect and consideration.

4. Talk to You Only When They Need Help

Have you noticed that the only time the person in question seems to reach out to you is when they need something? If this sounds familiar, it may be a sign that you are being taken for granted.

If someone is taking advantage of your generosity and kindness by always expecting things from you, try to set clear limits around what you can offer. You can tell them that you have limited time and resources to help, or they need to treat you with respect and consideration.

5. Unlistening Ear

When we are being taken for granted, it can feel like the other person doesn’t really care about what we have to say. They may seem distracted or disinterested when we are talking, or they may appear to “zone out” or tune us out.

The best way to deal with this situation is to be clear and direct about your feelings. Tell the other person that you want their full attention when you are speaking, or let them know if they appear distracted or not listening; it makes you feel ignored and disrespected.

6. No Effort to meet Your Requests

Has the person in question done all they can to meet your requests and needs? If not, it may be a sign that you are being taken for granted.

No one wants to feel like their needs aren’t important or that they are being taken for granted. If you find yourself struggling to get your requests met, address the situation directly with the other person. Talk to them about what you need and work together to find a solution.

7. Unavailable for You

Many of us rely on our loved ones and friends to be there for us when we need them. Yet being taken for granted can leave you feeling completely alone and unsupported by the people who should care about your wellbeing.

You may feel like the person in question is unavailable for you, either emotionally or physically. If this is true, it’s important to start identifying what they can and can’t do for you. You may even need to end the relationship if they aren’t willing to make changes.

7 Tips to Stop Being Taken for Granted

After experiencing the signs of being taken for granted, it can be hard to know how to deal with the situation. If you are tired of feeling unappreciated and unhappy in your interactions with someone, here are a few tips that can help you take back control: 

Tips to Stop Being Taken for Granted

1. Learn to Say No 

This might sound simple, but if you find yourself constantly bending over backward to meet the needs of others, it can be easy to get lost in their demands. Instead of always saying yes, start practicing the art of saying no and setting boundaries around what you can and can’t do.

No is a complete sentence, so don’t feel the need to justify yourself or offer too many explanations. If you feel overwhelmed by the unreasonable or taxing time and energy requests, it’s okay to say no. You can also prevent yourself from falling in love with the wrong person.

2. Set Boundaries

Along with learning to say no, it can also be helpful to set clear boundaries around what you will and won’t tolerate. For example, you may not want to be around someone who’s disrespectful of your time or constantly interrupts you; this is a sign that it might be time to set a boundary about how the person treats you.

There is no one-size-fits-all approach to setting boundaries, so the key is to be honest about what you feel comfortable with and what isn’t acceptable to you. You should avoid bending to the other person’s needs or expectations. Stick to your rules for a healthy relationship unless it is necessary to compromise.

3. Express Your Feelings

When someone is taking advantage of you, expressing your feelings honestly and openly can be difficult. However, if you are uncomfortable with how the situation has developed, it’s important to let the other person know.

You may feel hesitant to be vulnerable or afraid that what you have to say will make things worse. However, being honest and open about your feelings can help improve the situation; they may not even realize how their actions affect you and appreciate the chance to work through it together.

4. Limit Your Availability

The last thing you may want to do is limit your availability for the person taking advantage of you, but it can be an effective way to change their behavior. Start by limiting your time and energy commitment to only the things that are meaningful and important to you.

If possible, set limits on how often you are available or ensure they understand that you have other commitments that take priority. This can be a hard conversation, but it may be necessary to establish boundaries and regain control of your relationships.

5. Give Feedback

Although silence can seem like the easiest way to deal with someone who takes advantage of you, it can also be extremely damaging in the long run. By not giving feedback, they may continue their behavior and never realize how it affects you.

Instead of letting things fester or ignoring your feelings, give regular and honest feedback to help them understand what’s happening. Let the person know what they are doing that makes you uncomfortable and how it makes you feel. This can be a difficult conversation, but it’s ultimately beneficial for both parties.

6. Give Your Needs Priority

It is possible to forget your needs and prioritize the other person in a relationship, especially when you care about them. However, if someone is taking advantage of you, it can be important to remember that you also deserve to have your needs met.

To avoid being taken for granted by others, ensure that your needs are a priority. This might mean setting aside time for yourself, sticking to your commitments, or communicating your needs honestly and directly. By maintaining healthy habits and relationships with others, you can better avoid being taken advantage of by them.

7. Have a Stand & Make It Known

Once in a while, it is okay to compromise or bend your rules, but at other times, it can be necessary to stand up for yourself and make your boundaries known. If someone is consistently taking advantage of you or doesn’t respect the limits you have set, it may be time to make a change.

Doing this can help you be assertive and confident in your boundaries. If the person refuses to change their behavior or continues to take advantage of you, you may need to consider seeking help from a trusted friend or professional. By standing up for yourself and taking control of the situation, you can avoid being taken for granted by others.

Any relationship requires a give-and-take approach, but there is a big difference between compromise and being taken for granted. By taking steps to ensure your needs are met and standing up for yourself when necessary, you can avoid being taken advantage of by others.​

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